I knew this day would come, but now that it has, I fear for the future. Let me take you back ten plus years when I first got involved with the "smack," as I call it. I was young and innocent, and sure I drank soda, but I only drank it to fit in. Then I found Mountain Dew and after a few years I stopped drinking it just around friends. It would find its way into my shopping cart or I would tell my roommates that I needed to run out for some pumpernickel but instead I would come home sans pumpernickel but with MD on my breath.
Years later, I have accepted my addiction, I have grown to love it and celebrate it. After all Mountain Dew is the sweet sweet nectar of the gods and who am I to deny myself a swig of the beautiful electric pee tinted goodness. I finally made the switch to Diet Mountain Dew after my systems declared that all that sugar can and will eventually cripple me.
I have tried to quit before (unsuccessfully) but this year I decided enough is enough and I gave it up entirely, that is until today. I had a completely crusty day that I can't really explain except that I was feeling fairly surly and started thinking about DMD again. I was out and about with the kids and I realized all my problems would go away if I could just have a 32oz of the good stuff from my favorite Crest. The more I thought about it the more I convinced myself that, Yes, I did indeed need that drink.
So I got it, it wasn't anything like I remembered; it was hideous, completely unsatisfying and gross. My sisters would tell me that you have to push past the after taste, keep drinking until it is good again. It wasn’t just the after taste, it was the before taste, and the taste taste that was just no good.
This really should be good news, I should be glad to put this behind me, but I’m not. I now have nothing to fall back on, I can't drink regular MD anymore because it is too sweet and now my DMD has betrayed me as well. I know it sounds ridiculous but I don't think I can accurately explain the disappointment. It's like finding out your BFF only wrote K.I.T. in your high school yearbook.
Oh the Humanity!
Years later, I have accepted my addiction, I have grown to love it and celebrate it. After all Mountain Dew is the sweet sweet nectar of the gods and who am I to deny myself a swig of the beautiful electric pee tinted goodness. I finally made the switch to Diet Mountain Dew after my systems declared that all that sugar can and will eventually cripple me.
I have tried to quit before (unsuccessfully) but this year I decided enough is enough and I gave it up entirely, that is until today. I had a completely crusty day that I can't really explain except that I was feeling fairly surly and started thinking about DMD again. I was out and about with the kids and I realized all my problems would go away if I could just have a 32oz of the good stuff from my favorite Crest. The more I thought about it the more I convinced myself that, Yes, I did indeed need that drink.
So I got it, it wasn't anything like I remembered; it was hideous, completely unsatisfying and gross. My sisters would tell me that you have to push past the after taste, keep drinking until it is good again. It wasn’t just the after taste, it was the before taste, and the taste taste that was just no good.
This really should be good news, I should be glad to put this behind me, but I’m not. I now have nothing to fall back on, I can't drink regular MD anymore because it is too sweet and now my DMD has betrayed me as well. I know it sounds ridiculous but I don't think I can accurately explain the disappointment. It's like finding out your BFF only wrote K.I.T. in your high school yearbook.
Oh the Humanity!
5 comments:
you crack me up. Though I am sorry that your "smack" has turned it's back on you. Good Luck!
Yes, I find that after quitting my coke addiction and trying to go back it tastes completely gross. Be strong though, sometimes I start to drink it again for no good reason until it tastes good again. It is a viscious cycle.
Oh I am so sad for you! I feel your pain. I can no longer enjoy diet coke . Fortunately for me, I discovered diet wild cherry pepsi and have even brought it into my home (a DIET COKE home -I know, the shame).
Sigh, there's always something else.
I am soooo sorry for you. Since I have not yet given up Diet Mountain Dew it still tastes delicious to me. I can only imagine the pain! Maybe this is a sign that I better always drink Dt. MD and often enough that I don't have to experience this sad moment.
I think it is Crest's fault. I'm a Mt. Dew Nazi and I drink it rarely so it has to be the perfect mix. Don't blame the Dew!
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